[00:00:00] Welcome back to the MilSpouse Mastermind Show. All this month we have been talking about setting goals, planning your 2023, figuring out who you want to be and how you want to level up your life this year, and that’s why I’m so excited to share today’s guest with you because they are passionate about these very same.

[00:00:24] Shayna and Vanessa are on a mission to help women get unstuck and level up their lives through financial coaching. Shayna a military spouse and Vanessa are best friends and business partners. They met in 2012 when their kids were in pre-k. Together they are both Jesus followers wives to amazing husbands, and moms to awesome kiddos.

[00:00:48] They live in Navar. Where the beaches are beautiful and the sun is almost always shining. They launched ideal balance on April Fool’s Day 2020, when they realized that what so many women needed was not. Just more information. It was to take action and their goal is to help their clients do just that. So today we’re gonna talk about how they became passionate about coaching, how they launched their business, and what they do to help women and couples budget and save.

[00:01:26] They also share some really practical tips for military families specifically who are looking to create a budget, save money or set their families up for long-term financial health and success. So whether you are trying to work on setting better budgeting goals, this. Or you’re just wondering how you use your skills and the things that light you up to make an impact in the lives of others.

[00:01:59] You’re going to get a lot out of this conversation, so let’s go ahead and dive into the show.

[00:02:57] Friends, I am. So excited for those of you I got to speak with in last week’s plan, your 2023 workshop. I am excited for how you are going to grow this year, how you’re going to step into owning your story and doing that thing that is on your heart, whether it is a personal health and fitness goal, that you are focused on this.

[00:03:23] Or whether this is the year you actually launch your business. But here’s what I want to say to those of you that miss the workshop. Some years it’s going to feel like we make a lot of progress towards becoming who we’re meant to be. In some years, it feels like we can barely keep our heads above water.

[00:03:48] But the thing that will hold you back the most from actually doing something that you wanna do from actually making any progress and changing your life is for you to do nothing, is for you to not set any intentions. For the new year, if you’re not having a goal to work towards, you’re probably not going to make a lot of progress.

[00:04:13] Or if you just set a very vague goal of, I just want to. Improve my life this year. That’s not tangible enough. It’s not sticky enough or measurable enough for you to actually do something with it. It’s just an idea, a dream. But a dream cannot become a reality without a plan to get there. Our plan to move towards the thing on your.

[00:04:43] But friend, this is what I want for you this year. I want you to step into a life where you are not just existing, but truly living and designing a life you love, that you are moving towards discovering who you are meant to be. I want you to wake up excited and empowered to live and to love, and to make a.

[00:05:09] In the world and that happens when you plan your 2023. So I just wanna let you know a replay of the workshop is available on the website. You can get access to the full replay and the workbook to guide you through setting up your year. Planning your year using my flexible goal setting method, and that is available when you go to milspouse mastermind.com/plan your 2023.

[00:05:40] I will leave that link up for just a couple more weeks, so please go take advantage of it before it comes down. I know life is crazy. I know that we can be reluctant to set goals when. Feels crazy sometimes. We already feel frustrated and we don’t wanna add to feeling guilty or discouraged that we’re not making more progress.

[00:06:06] But the whole reason I teach the flexible goal setting method is because it’s not about the outcome. It’s about the progress that we’re making. It’s about how we show up on a daily basis. It’s about our intention. This is meant to give you life. Not to beat you down. So I just want to say it is possible for you, and I believe you were made with and for a purpose, and it’s time for you to step into your story and to design a life you love.

[00:06:42] All right, as we are talking about setting goals for the year, we are talking about upleveling our lives, and we are talking about why. Our finances are an important piece of this puzzle. So let’s go ahead and dive into my conversation with Shayna and Vanessa of Ideal Balance. All right, Shayna and Vanessa, welcome to the MilSpouse Mastermind Show.

[00:07:07] I’m gonna have each of you say hello, so we can see whose voice goes with who’s. And then I would love for you guys to just give us a little bit of background about who you are and what. Uh, I am Vanessa. I’m Shayna. Could you tell the difference? I hope so. , we are, um, not only best friends but business partners and we’ve known each other for 10 years, since our boys were four and they’re now 14.

[00:07:30] Um, we met at the Y M C A working out together. We started our business on April Fool’s Day 2020 smack dab in the middle of the pandemic. So was there anything in particular about that date that made you like, this is the day we’re. . Um, I think we’ve been collaborating since 2019 and God really, um, had neon shining lights that we were needed, that we were supposed to be in business together.

[00:07:56] Yeah. And then so we kind of collaborated all fall into the winter, and then we were sitting at my kitchen table, I think, and we’re like, okay. It’s April 1st. Today’s today we’re gonna do this. And, uh, wow. Was that a, was that a roller coaster ride? ? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Went fast after that for sure. Yep. And Shayna, what about you?

[00:08:12] Um, what about me? Uh, well, so I am a military spouse. Retired, like, let’s put that Rhett right next to it. But before that I was a military brat and then I was in the Air Force. And then, um, my husband. Uh, retired in 2020 right before everything happened and Vanessa and I met when we were stationed to here with her the first time we’ve left and come back.

[00:08:34] And then we started our business together. And a lot of our clients are, um, military. Yes. Cause we live in a very. Heavy military area, which is perfect because I know how to do military finances, so it works out really well. and Vanessa’s just really good at finances anyway. Um, so it just really works out that way.

[00:08:52] Okay. So before we get started, how does it feel to be rooted in one spot now? Oh, listen, it’s weird. I ha I hired a life coach last year because I thought, Something must be wrong. There’s no stress, there’s no next step upcoming thing. There’s no million plans to make just so that the military changes it every 13 seconds.

[00:09:14] What am I doing? Like, what do I do with my hands? . But, um, it’s pretty cool. It’s, it’s kind of crazy to have. , um, that sort of choice and, um, you know, decision making power, but it’s really, it’s fun. And now you get to be rooted, like you said. And by the time you’ve done that many years, it’s, you’re ready. Like, I was really excited when we started, but by that point you’re like, can we, can we pause?

[00:09:36] Is that okay? Can we just stay in one place for a long time? It’d be great. I have this fear, like I go back and forth between like, okay, like the idea of having a house that I can just decorate that house and like make it my own sounds amazing. But then part of me thinks that in a few years I’ll get bored and get itchy to start moving somewhere else.

[00:09:59] Yeah. I will tell you, I have been in Navar since I was seven, and um, so I, I’ve never, we’ve never, I’m not military. My husband is bald. Everyone thinks he’s military cuz he looks like it. But we’ve been here for a really long time. So the opposite effect for me is, Gosh, how amazing would that be to be able to travel and go different places and up on a web, Hey, one year, two years, three years, we’re up and out and you start a new beginning.

[00:10:24] So I will, I will say yes. It probably, you think that it’s really nice to finally pick that home, but I, I wonder if you would miss, right. Miss it. Um, the constant change. The constant on the go. Yeah. Cause I think I would, I think I would definitely, um, I would’ve loved that . Yeah. I think How old are, do you, do you have kid.

[00:10:44] Yes, they are three, five, and seven. So that’s when it really starts to change. And you wanna be rooted then once they get older, because when, when my kids started having to say goodbye to their friends every few years, that was heartbreaking. And now they have friendships, which I didn’t have as a military brat.

[00:11:00] They have friendships that can potentially last their whole lives, and that’s really cool. And it it, and there’s enough. There’s enough. Once they get older. There’s so things to do that I feel like I’m fine. I, if I was moving and trying to do all of this and relearn everything every time, I don’t know if I would be good at that.

[00:11:16] But as you, as you do, you find some way to express your need to be busy and productive. Uh, anyway. And, um, that’s so like having a business is a great alternative instead of moving . Yeah. Keeps your mind. Yes, when you are trying to do all the things, it is a lot. Uh, and I know like there’s that idea that the grass is always greener on the other side, but I think there are blessings too.

[00:11:41] Both. And there are things that I will be sad when, when, when we are done and we don’t get to like see a new place every few years. What, what we’ll talk about today, then you can just budget. To travel on purpose. Mm-hmm. You know, like one thing that we’ve been realizing lately is we have, I’m gonna cover her ears since she doesn’t hear me.

[00:12:01] We have four spring breaks left with our boys. So you can really utilize, you know, once you’re in place, you can go places on purpose. On purpose instead of where somebody else wants you to go. Yeah. And that can be cool. Yes, there’s that. I look forward to traveling. I have this travel bug and I have actually, Traveled less for fun.

[00:12:19] Yeah. Since marrying somebody in the military. Just because we traveled to see family, we traveled because we’re moving and I’m like, I just, I just like to travel for fun. Yeah. That could be a thing. . All right. So talk a little bit about your business. Um, you said, I know we talked about it got started in 2020.

[00:12:37] What was the idea behind it and how do you help people? The idea behind it , we, we do, our brains don’t stop moving or working , should I say. And we’re, we are very fascinated in wanting, in the idea of helping women and helping them succeed in their life and helping them reach that next level. And, and we have been through a lot with our lives financially.

[00:13:01] Um, you know, she gave me a book 10 years ago and it was Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover. And she’s like, here, read this. My husband says, we already do it. And I was like, okay, great. And I took it and I was like, we’re selling everything. And I went to Europe for three months with the kids to see my grandparents and came back and sold the big house and got the tiny house and was mortgage free and debt free at 31.

[00:13:22] And it really propelled me to say like, like, what, what was this reason? Like I know this, I know it happened because of hard work. , but what’s the why behind it? And the why became to help other people and show other people that they can do it too. And they don’t have to be this millionaire mm-hmm. to be able to ha, you know, make it work.

[00:13:40] And she has a huge story on health and fitness and, um, so we decided to start, you know, a coaching facility, uh, our coaching studio on helping women, uh, live their best life. Yeah. And, um, specifically with finances, um, just the amount, like when we, I went through fpu, I don’t know if you know about financial piece of university and the.

[00:14:00] Of marriage improvement. Yeah. Like, you know, that I, I saw And then knowing in the military community, like seeing. The strife. There’s so many factors that go into it, but there’s so much stress and anxiety and bad communication and fights and everything. With money, we were just like, this is such a big need because like she said, it’s not for millionaires.

[00:14:22] This is for everyday, everyday woman who has. Money and wants to, do you feel a calling to be a better steward? To do better with it to to make it go further. To make it go the right places. That’s what we do and we help people. Once they improve their marriages, they stop fighting about money, and then they get to start funding stuff.

[00:14:39] They’re for fun, their vacations for fun on purpose, instead of the same one every Christmas back home, and stuff like that, you know? That’s kind of the, where it started. Yeah. And they start seeing their money work for them in their favor, planning on purpose, doing things on purpose, building wealth. Um, you know, we’ve helped many people who were in the military transitioned to either retiring or getting out on purpose because now they can financially afford it and they can now do this dream job that they always thought they wanted to do, um, if that’s their choice, you know?

[00:15:08] And so it’s just, it’s just been amazing to watch people. Form, like their lives completely transformed because of better financial habits. I mean, I think it’s, it’s a conversation that I’ve been wanting to have on the show for a while because we all have budgeting challenges as military families. Mm-hmm.

[00:15:28] uh, when you move a lot, that can be expensive and you know, if you’re stationed somewhere where cost of living is really high. Yeah. And if you. in a place where your b a H isn’t covering the cost of your housing, that can be a financial drain and like you said, , it’s one of the number one causes of strife in marriages.

[00:15:49] And there’s enough challenges in military marriages as it’s that when you add that money component, it just makes it even more challenging. So let’s start there and talk about money and marriage. Conversations because I know this is this area where people struggle to communicate well. Yes, absolutely.

[00:16:13] It’s not only the area they struggle to communicate well, it’s the worst area of communication I feel like in human, in our human population. Yeah. And in especially marriages. It’s like this. Bad juju to talk about money. And then it’s like taboo, right? Yeah. It’s taboo. And then, and then, then whatever baggage you bring in about money into the marriage, then there’s that added on or the baggage about money that you didn’t know that was there.

[00:16:37] Now you have to have a hard conversation about it. Right? Right. So, um, so the first thing that we wanna say is that it’s important to communicate on purpose. So many times these conversations that we have about money are. , like as I’m passing you, right? Like, oh, by the way, way . Or just to let you know. Yeah.

[00:16:58] Or, um, you know, when the card bounces cuz you’re trying to buy dinner. Oh, what happened? Like, yeah. So instead we wanna set aside time on purpose to talk about money because it is what is. Uh, making your life happen. Yeah. You know, it’s not, it’s not to talk about it because it’s, um, you know, we’re, we’re vain or whatever and we wanna talk about how much money we have.

[00:17:19] It’s like, this is important part of our life. Mm-hmm. , it, it is what makes us be able to do things. So we need to talk about it on purpose. Yeah. We don’t wanna be driven by money. Right. Like, but also we have to understand that money makes. The world around. We all have money. We need money to survive, and so we have to talk about it.

[00:17:34] We have to be open, we have to communicate about it. We have to know what’s going on. I mean, usually in a marriage, there’s always gonna be one person that does the finances, right? Sometimes it’s the wife, sometimes it’s the husband. But you still have to communicate together about it. It can’t be one person does it and the other person just.

[00:17:50] Is given a card and maybe on allowance. Yeah, yeah. On allowance or gets yelled at when they go over. Mm-hmm. Whatever. You know what I mean? Like you both have to know and understand the finances and the bank account and why it’s there and how it’s being used. Yeah. And so we basically just say, schedule it, you know, the idea being theoretically once a month, if not more often.

[00:18:07] Um, once a month for sure. We need to schedule time to talk about it. Yep. And this is important. We’re gonna talk about what happens in the meeting in a. , but what doesn’t happen outside, when Vanessa said there’s different personalities, there are people like me maybe that I don’t wanna talk about money all the time.

[00:18:24] Like it, I just, I, I don’t, I know it’s there, it’s fine. It’s over there. But then there’s my husband who’s like, look at this new budget I created every 13 seconds, literally. And I’m like, that’s great, babe. We’ll talk about that at a bunch meeting. So the important thing is to schedule and then whichever one of you is the crazy one, I’m just kidding.

[00:18:39] The really smart, awesome person. You’re not allowed to talk about it outside of that meeting, right? Mm-hmm. , because it does, like if there’s, there’s two constant stress. Yeah. Yeah. So, so we are gonna schedule it, and then we’re not gonna be talking about it outside of the meeting, and we’re not gonna be a barking chihuahua is what Dave Ramsey are, we’re certified through Dave, that’s what he calls it.

[00:18:56] Like you’re just nipping at their heels constantly, da da da da da, da about it. It’s like, no, no, no. That’s no longer allowed. Okay, we’re gonna save it for the meeting. Because you have usually a financial gu reward the saver, and then you have the spender. And when you’re bringing it up to the spender all the time, it, it really is kind of a stressor for them.

[00:19:12] And so you wanna respect that. You wanna respect your spouse and how they feel about money. And then they want, you want them to respect you and how you, how you see money. And so if you schedule it, like Shannon said, have it on purpose once a month, there’s 365 days of the year, we’re asking you for 12 of those.

[00:19:26] Mm-hmm. to sit down, schedule it, make it on. Um, and make it fun. Like you have the opportunity to make it a date night. You know, send the kids to bed, bring snacks, bring drinks, bring fun things or whatever, you know, and, and talk about it. So it’s an open conversation and not like this stressful, dreadful, dreaded meeting in a dark with like a spotlight on you.

[00:19:47] Like, oh, it’s not that. Like, my life is over. Yes. I might as well just call it now. No, it’s, it can be a fun thing. You’re dreaming about your goals together, you’re financing your goals. Yeah. And you’re talking about that in this meeting. You’re paying for your daughter to go to singing lessons or whatever.

[00:20:01] Like, there’s cool things that are happening in this meeting, so we’re gonna make it fun. Um, the degree of fun that you wanna make, it is up to you. My husband and I go to a brewery with a, with a laptop and we do a spreadsheet and that’s how it’s happening. And we’re nerdy and we accept it fully. We had a client and I love her.

[00:20:16] I’ll never. I, I have to say it. Yeah. She’s like, the only way I could get him to the budget meeting is I, if I had agreed to be naked. And it worked. It worked for them. They got debt free. They are amazing humans. I love them so much. They’re actually very godly people. Yes. Sounds weird, but , but that’s what she did to make it fun for him.

[00:20:32] But anyway, it’s just like, let’s stop dreading this conversation. Let’s make it on purpose. Make it fun. It’s gonna be okay. We’re gonna make it through. Yeah. Well, I love that. I, I really think the more you dread something, it’s really. Energy and the perspective that you bring to it, that really kind of sets the tone for the whole thing.

[00:20:50] So we’re coming, we’re setting aside a timeframe meeting. We’re gonna make it fun. and then what happened? Yeah. Right. Well, and then what happens? , um, so we’re, today we thought we would talk a little bit specifically about how, you know, military people can use, um, allotments and stuff, but in the meeting you’re dreaming mm-hmm.

[00:21:09] you’re planning, you’re budgeting, you’re doing all of that stuff. Yeah. If you’ve never sat down, even had a vision, cast meeting with your spouse before. That’s the first thing. Yeah. Yeah. This is a great time to set an extra like five, 10 minutes aside and say, first of all, what are our financial goals?

[00:21:22] This may be the first time that you guys are asking each other that. Mm-hmm. , I mean, I think when you’re, um, dating or whatever, you might throw out some, some goals and some life missions that you have, but then when you’re married and the business of life, right? Yeah. Everything happens. You’re moving in the military, somebody gets t d y, right?

[00:21:38] You have kids, you kind of forget about all. Um, and then you forget to do it again. So if you can sit down and have a vision meeting and say, what are, what are our goals? Yeah. What are we striving for? Set that, and then from there you can make everything else in line with what that vision is. Yeah. Yeah. We call it a dream date meeting.

[00:21:56] Yeah. Because like Vanessa said, you get so busy as a couple with the life, uh, the business of life. That you stopped dreaming. That’s what you did when you first got together. You were dreaming about your children or your house or whatever. You’re dreaming about these things. So, so you wanna make sure you have a, a time to dream and that’s what really starts to unite you.

[00:22:12] Like you don’t wanna do all of this work of budgeting and, and talking about money. If you don’t have a shared vision, that’s exciting. Like, and if you don’t know where it’s going, yeah, like, then you’re just doing it. And that’s actually where most people are at. They’re just going through the races, they’re just making the motions.

[00:22:25] And you don’t know for the why. What’s the why at the end. So you’re just trying to buy the groceries. Pay for the kids’ activities and all the things, and all of a sudden like, okay, there’s nothing left in the bank. Yeah. And that, yeah. So that’s, that’s, so that’s the first thing. Um, and then you can, so, you know, one thing we thought that would be helpful for your um, folks is to talk about using.

[00:22:46] Allotments to reach your financial goals? Yeah, so obviously, you know, you prob everybody may or may not know what an allotment is, but it’s where the, the military will take out money from the first and the 15th paycheck specifically and put it in one spot, right? So it’s taking out of each paycheck evenly.

[00:23:02] to go to one spot that you direct it to? Yeah. I mean, we wanted to just draw attention to, some people may not know I’ve never signed up for it or Right. Um, didn’t know that you could use it for that first saving purposes. Right. So we wanted to bring attention and bring light to that, that use them, there’s these opportunities for you to have these basically savings accounts that you could use, um, to help save you money and you should take advantage of it.

[00:23:25] Yeah. And then, . Once you do that, it’s helping you keep that money. It’s putting that money out of sight, out of mind. In the civilian world, a lot of people, their insurance comes out before they see it, which is important so that your insurance bill never bounces. If you don’t ever see it, then you’re not gonna start thinking your brain to spend it.

[00:23:40] So it’s outta sight outta mind. It also keeps you more accountable. Mm-hmm. , because what’s left over from whatever your goals were with the allotment. what’s left over and in your bank account, you know for sure. That’s all the money you have. Yeah. . And so you can, you can hold yourself accountable to that, and that kind of helps.

[00:23:54] I feel like there’s a lot of people out there that their spouse gets the paycheck, they just see the money in the bank and really there’s no concept of. What’s possible or how you would go about getting started with allotments. So can you kind of speak just that basic foundation? How would you go about getting that set up and who to talk to, how you get started?

[00:24:16] Yeah, so that’s just, it’s really funny because I have so many clients that, like the wife has the account access, right? So it’s, or the, uh, the non-military spouse anyway, so it’s just. Um, yeah, you’re just gonna go to their, you know, their, my pay or whatever, whatever. What is the website now called? It’s changed so many times.

[00:24:33] It’s my pay, I’m pretty sure the dfa s log on where you log in and you elect how much taxes you’re giving and all that kinda stuff. It’s the same place. It’s very, they make it very, very easy to set up. The hardest part is logging in to anything’s true. Logging into, that’s true in these days. It’s really hard once you do that.

[00:24:50] you have to maybe give them some blood. You’ve made it anyway. So it’s just on that website, it’s very simple. It’s easy to do. Um, like I said, logging in is the part, is the hardest part. But to back up , that is one of the things that we want to solve here is it cannot be a one one person show. Yeah. And, and sometimes it just is out of necessity.

[00:25:07] It just has been. And, and I think it’s especially important, the reason this is like so important. On, on, on one hand, you can’t leave who the non-military spouse hanging and they need to have understanding and access and con and some control to the finances. and they need to know like what’s going on.

[00:25:26] Yeah. Right. And then on the other end, I always think of the member military, if they’re deployed or they’re T D I or whatever they’re doing, they don’t need to be worried about money . It’s the last thing they need to be worried about. Right. So we really have to, as a military couple, get on the same page and be doing it together because it’s not fair to either one.

[00:25:45] Especially the environment to do it alone. Yeah. And I don’t think it’s on purpose. I think it just happens and then it just ends up being the way that you do things and then you don’t think to change it or what’s, it’s been working, working, quote unquote. Right. So you don’t really think to, to modify it.

[00:26:02] But like Shayna said, if when you have both of you guys on the same team working at it together, , the one that’s gone doesn’t need to worry about it. So the one at home can, and then when you’re home, then you can both tackle it together and then you both know where everything is and how to access it.

[00:26:16] Yeah. And, and the amount of money that’s going towards what, so it just makes it a lot simpler when you’re going to talk about your budget and, um, it just makes it easier in general when you are trying to reach your goals. If you don’t know what your goals are and it’s really hard to reach them. Weird, it’s really hard to reach them.

[00:26:34] Yeah. If you don’t know them for sure. But then, . It’s just, it’s just about like the improvement in your marriage is gonna start when you confront all these things. Because let’s be honest, the reason that a lot of times we’re not sharing stuff is because we’re not being honest about what we’re doing with our money.

[00:26:49] Yeah. And it’s not necessarily that you’re being sneaky, but it’s just, I don’t, it’s, it’s kind of icky. You don’t really wanna talk about it, but you probably both want to honestly have that issue a little bit, but, but it’s better to get it out on the table because it’s just gonna keep, that’s the hardest part.

[00:27:02] It’s gonna keep nagging. Like we have so many clients that they end up our clients because, . Well, I finally told him I had that credit card , and he said, I better get some help. So here I am. And that’s fine. Like, let’s just get rip the bandaid off. Yeah. Like you can totally recover and heal and, and your marriage can be improving and y’all can be on top of your finances together, but you’ve got to confront and get it all on the table.

[00:27:24] And it’s usually way less scary Yes. Than it seems in your head. For sure. Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think some people are like, okay, like I, I really don’t wanna cut back on the target. Or there’s the idea of, Hey, I just don’t enjoy numbers and I want somebody else to take care of that. But I think it’s so important as a military spouse to be informed for exactly what you talk about, if your spouse is T D y, if they’re deployed, if something happens to them.

[00:27:52] It’s so important to have that understanding of what the finances are and how to manage. Well, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And, and just about the target. . First of all, , I think that you, you help your, your community already. I, I’ve heard your podcast telling them, you know, find, find some peace and some find your purpose and do all of that, which will help with the target trips on one hand.

[00:28:17] Mm-hmm. . So, we’ll, we’ll, that, we’ll leave that part to you. As far as the budget though. Let’s budget the target trips. Like it’s not about, that’s what people think. Budgeting is. This B word is what we’ve heard it called . Yeah. But it does restricting. Yeah. It’s giving you freedom like, okay, this, I know every month, this is how much I can spend the target to my heart’s content or whatever.

[00:28:37] And I don’t have to feel guilty, I don’t have to worry. I know it’s there and I can do it. And that’s, that’s what the budget is, right? Yeah. And then also looking at the budget, you might find, hey, If I don’t spend 500 and I just do 200 at Target every month, what could I do with that? Oh, we can go to Disney.

[00:28:56] Oh, we could, or whatever, and, and it just helps you realign your values. It’s never about not doing anything. It’s like, what’s more important right now? Because I haven’t looked at the long-term vision, or we haven’t talked about it as a couple. Going to target seems like the most fun thing. But when I really step back and look at it, like us taking that this isn’t personal, now, us taking that trip to Greece as a couple that we’ve been saying that is way more important than going out to eat every night or whatever.

[00:29:20] You know what I mean? So I just wanna throw that little caveat in there. Yeah. We always have a non-negotiable line item in our client’s budget. Um, Fun spending because you need it. If you don’t have that. And we tell ’em, it’s a non-negotiable, um, because if you don’t have it, you’re gonna find it and you’re gonna spend it, um, elsewhere.

[00:29:36] So it’s okay to have those, those trips to target. But we always tell clients too, like ask, if you go ask a wealthy person how they got wealthy, it’s not gonna be on accident. It was on purpose. Right. And like Shayna said, it’s okay to take the trips or it’s okay to go here. It’s okay to go here as long as it aligns with your vision and your.

[00:29:53] I mean, I think it’s interesting because it ties into everything that we talk about on this podcast. Number one, it comes down to your mindset and. Thinking about it in a different way and seeing it not as something that’s holding you back, but something that’s actually giving you freedom. Right? Yep. And shifting the way that we think about money is an important starting point.

[00:30:15] And then it comes down to habit formation, right? If you are focused on what’s gonna make you happy in the short term, then you never achieve a long-term goal for anything, right? And really being able to keep that long-term goal in mind so that you are making your decisions and your actions based on what you really want long term, not just what’s going to feel good in the moment.

[00:30:43] Yeah. We, we like to call that adulting . It’s annoying . We’re like, this is what being a grownup is all about with your money. Welcome. Yeah. But I think the, the big point that you’re saying about like confronting, confronting those habits and confronting it is in the mindset. Like, how many times I’ve had, you know, a single mom, military mom, whatever it is, they think they’re bad with money.

[00:31:06] Yeah. And I’m like, let’s look at the facts here. You’re doing really well with what you’ve got and what you. , I’m going, all you need is more information. Mm-hmm. and a little coaching to, to put it into action. Like you’re doing really well and you’re identifying as this person that’s terrible with money.

[00:31:22] And that’s wrong. It’s not true. Because they wanna do better. Yeah. They want to be good with money. They just don’t, like Shannon said, they’re, they don’t know what they don’t know. And that’s, so we love to come in and help them. This is, this is brand new information right now. What are you gonna do with it?

[00:31:35] And then you watch them soar with it. Mm-hmm. . So it’s just really cool. Well, and you’re there to help them along the way. It’s not just like you read a book about the subject and then you’re like, but it’s, I’m still not doing it. You’re there to coach them along the way and, and give that support. Mm-hmm.

[00:31:52] So with allotments, uh, going back to that really quick, you can use that to set up, um, to use that for bills, for saving, for investing for Christmas account. There’s so many different ways that you could use it. Um, and so we just wanted to point that out, that it doesn’t necessarily have to be, I don’t know.

[00:32:09] What is an, what’s a, a reason you would use an allotment, uh, to pay a bill specifically, right? Like to pay your car payment or whatever, something like that. Yeah, I think, and I think I, most of my clients would do something like that with it, but you can make it fun. It can be a fun way to use an allotment.

[00:32:22] I’m safer, a Disney trip or something. Vacation. So just keep that in. Yeah. But um, today we kind of wanted to dive a little bit deep into, so you can use it for saving, you can use it for investing, you can do it for lots of things. Our favorite system that we teach our clients is, and this is everybody, but it works so much easier with military cause they can do allotments, is an automatic bills account.

[00:32:42] Because bills are important to pay on time. Okay. Yeah. Because first of all, I don’t know if your audience understands how much it frustrates us that billions of dollars are paid in NSF fees every year. Every year. Like 11. Is it like 11 billion? Something like that? Banks collect. That’s actually their biggest money maker.

[00:32:59] Is your not Is your bounce fee ? Yeah. So we hate those. And so that’s what this, so what we like to do is set up an automatic bills account because it separate. You’re spending money and your bills money, which those bills have to be paid. There’s no ifs, ands, or by this, whether or not you go to Target is questionable.

[00:33:17] Right. So we just separate that so that you can systemize it and get everything more organized and less willy-nilly. Yeah. Imagine having, basically it’s like having a personal assistant paying your bills, like you have this account. It’s only job is to pay bills. There’s nothing else that you’re doing with it.

[00:33:33] And, um, so like, like Shannon said, your grocery money, none of that is being put in that this account’s sole responsibility is to take care of your monthly, um, utilities or all that. So it just, it’s just, it’s a mind to changer. Every time we introduce it to a client, they’re like, why haven’t I been doing this for years?

[00:33:49] Um, her and I ended up. Separately didn’t even know before we even started our company. And then when we talked about it, we’re like, I do that. Oh, you do? That has said it. It’s changed my life. And so we just implemented it with all of our clients and uh, it’s just worked really well. Yeah. So real quick, we’ll just walk you through how to set it up.

[00:34:03] Yep. Um, the first thing you wanna do is designate an account that’s, Specifically for bills. And real quick, the definition of Bills is you, is something that is invoiced monthly, basically. That’s how you know for sure the same amount, monthly at the same time. That’s generally a bill, right? Like your car payment, like your car payment, your, your cable bill, whatever.

[00:34:23] Those other things that are for funsies are not bills, right? Um, they are expenses, but they’re not bills. So that’s important, right? Because you need to be able to count on it monthly. Um, and so when you designate account, some people rep. An account. So you might already have an account where a lot of bills are coming out and you don’t wanna reenter all that.

[00:34:38] That’s one option. Another option is to open up a completely new account. Either way, this account is now going to be only for bills. We’re gonna rename it. Super fun. Yeah, it’s gonna be great. And um, we have a lot of names. Bills. Bills, bills. What we’re, I mean, we have so many more. We should, my name is No.

[00:34:53] Yeah, there’s all kinds of names. For the Bills account, but you rename it and you per re you designate the account. Mm-hmm. . So once that’s done, then you can start to set it up, right? Yeah. We bank suggestions. U S A A, um, any type of credit union is really, really good. You can, I mean, I think I have like, oh, I don’t know, like 19 accounts at my bank, but they’re very organized, they’re renamed, they’re all basically allotments.

[00:35:13] Um, where my husband’s money goes in, it funnels out to everything and you can watch it all grow and you know exactly what that money is for. So, alright, to set up the account. You’re gonna start this system at the beginning of a month, because if you start it in the middle of a month, you have some bills that have come out, some bills that haven’t come out.

[00:35:28] So you wanna make sure you start at the beginning of the month so that way you know how much money you need to put into it. Yeah. So you’re gonna make sure that the first thing you need to do is make sure your direct deposit, which is. In this case gonna be the allotment, right? Yeah. So we’re gonna, we’re gonna figure it out, but the amount, but the allotment is going to go into this account, right?

[00:35:45] And so, and, and that’s what you need to know. And nothing, nothing, nothing else. There’s some, it gets more complicated if you’re not military. It’s really exciting. But for military, it’s just the allotment. Um, and then you’re going to ensure you have a debit card for this account. Mm-hmm. , um, the, the same account.

[00:36:00] And then you’re gonna remove any way to spend money from this account other than that one debit. we’re gonna remove if what, what, what are some options? So like, if it’s attached to PayPal and Amazon and Walmart, um, Venmo, if this account is attached to anything that you spend money on, you need to remove it.

[00:36:17] Yeah. Except for like, mine is obviously attached to my Google account because I pay my Spotify with it. So, and the only reason why you need a debit card is for the chances of Bill, bill, bill doesn’t take an a ac ach, right? Like, uh, you know, like automatic payment. So that’s the only reason you do debit card.

[00:36:33] Everything else, if you have separate other account like debit cards, cause you used to share that account. Everything needs to go except for the one way to spend money. Um, and you’re gonna close those for sure. So then the next step is obviously the important part. This, you’re gonna have a budget, obviously, you’re gonna have had a budget because you’re so good at budgeting.

[00:36:50] So you’re, you’re good. Amazing. At budgeting now. Um, and you’re going to go ahead and figure out what your amount is. You’re gonna, you need a monthly amount for how much your bills are, right? So you’re gonna go line for line through your budget, debt, payments, or bills too. Mm-hmm. . So we’re gonna make sure we get those in there.

[00:37:03] And you’re gonna go through, You’re gonna add all of that up, but you’re also gonna set up every one of those bills to be automatic. Now, some of these you have maybe done or they did for you, so this is the opportunity. It’s gonna be a little work. It’s gonna be worth it. We’re gonna make sure every single one of these bills can be paid automatically.

[00:37:20] through the system, or we’re gonna pay them through like U S A A or Navy Federal. You can bill pay those, right? Every bill we’re gonna pay automatically. Yep. Um, and then we’re gonna try for the ACH payments, like we talked about, because they avoid the most fees. And sometimes you’ll get a discount too if you set up the ach.

[00:37:35] Yeah. And then if not, obviously you’re going to, um, use your debit card to, to pay that. And you’re gonna set up paperless billing while you. Let’s just do that. Do it. Just do, do it while you’re there. , because we’re working on automating everything. Paperless billing is part of that, right? And then also this debit card that you’ve net, you now have for this allotment account, um, for your bills.

[00:37:53] Once you set everything up and you’ve used the debit card to attach to all your bills or your ach. , you don’t carry that debit card on you. There’s no reason to have it. It doesn’t do anything for you cuz you’re not, remember, you’re not spending money outta this account so that debit card stays at home in the underwear drawer or the, or the safe or wherever.

[00:38:09] Right? So that way, um, you’re not spending it, and again, it, you’ve already removed it from all of your potential spending accounts online. Yeah. It’s only there for an emergency as far as like if a bill doesn’t get paid or something like a flute happens, or you need to add a new payment to your bills.

[00:38:24] Yeah. Um, and also when Shannon says anything that’s added monthly, . Uh, also add, like if you have quarterly bills, um, pest control, usually quarterly, things like that that come up. Sam’s Club memberships or things like that, make sure you add those on there too. And you add those to your monthly allotment.

[00:38:39] You just, you know, divide it by 12 so you can figure out how much you need to add monthly into that account. Yeah. So that, so what’s just talking about when you have that process of going through your bills and figuring out that, , that number is now your allotment number, right? And you’re gonna give it a little bit of a buffer.

[00:38:53] Not much, maybe like a hundred bucks. Kind of depends on what your, what your life is like. You’re gonna give it a little bit of a buffer just in case, you know, sometimes the electric bill is just a little bit or whatever, you know, so some, some stuff changes and you’re gonna set up your allotment and now you know what the allotment, it’s gonna pull half if you, if you, you gotta be careful because if you do it too soon or too late, it’s gonna pull it all from one paycheck, which is not gonna be the worst thing, cuz all your bills are gonna be, But you just gotta be aware of that.

[00:39:18] And then if you do it closer right before the 15th, then it’ll pull from both. Either way. Now all of your bill money is gonna be, that was the sucking with, they’re gonna be sucked out and automatically put into your bills account. Yeah. Cause your allotment amount is now going into your bills account.

[00:39:32] And that allotment amount is the amount of bills that you need or that you pay every month no matter what. Right. So now we’ve got it set up to where you’re getting the money deposited into the account. Mm-hmm. and we’ve set up all of these automatic payments and they’re going out automatically. . And so what’s, you don’t, so what’s happening is things are automatic and your life just became that much more simple.

[00:39:52] I mean, it is a, it’s really nice to see and, and literally her and I probably log in once a month in our account, or her husband log in once a month in the account just, just to make sure everything is the way it’s supposed to go and nothing is like a, you know, a wonky fee or whatever. Yeah. Um, and that you don’t have to do anything.

[00:40:08] Everything you’ve put the money in, the money is coming. . That’s it. That’s all you have to do. It’s so important because it saves your brain calories. What happens with most people is they’re doing what we call bank account balance. . And so they, they log in, they’re like, I have this much money. I should be good, but this is not good.

[00:40:25] The 11 billion NSF fees is proof of that. But the problem is, do I have enough for gas? What has every bill come out? I don’t know. I’m not pending. Is something still pending? Do I have enough money to go to Target today? Like we need to, we need to save those bank calories because now everything’s completely separate and we have another system for stuff like groceries and.

[00:40:43] Gas and gas and gas and all that, but for now, you will know my bills will be paid on time every month and everything left over. I know that it does. All my bills are paid and I can have that peace of mind. But more than that, like she had a client, she would wake up every Saturday, get her cup of coffee and spend a couple hours going over her bills and we’re like, what are you doing?

[00:41:01] That sounds terrible. Let’s show you a different way. So, so question, is it easy to change how much is coming in or out of the allotment account because here’s, here’s my. When you move all of those bills, all of those automatic payments, yeah. They change and trying to set up, okay, we’re, we’re here. Like what are, how much is everything gonna cost?

[00:41:25] How easy is it to change once you’ve set it that all up? Yeah. It’s really easy. And like we just, uh, we’ve had a client move from Colorado to Florida, uh, recently, and she changed. The, the rear thing is, it doesn’t change that much. Yeah. Think about what actually changes. Yeah. Maybe your power and your internet cable.

[00:41:41] Well, but even the amounts don’t change. Yeah. Like, right. So like sh her allotment I think was $3,900 and I think she moved it to 4,000 or something because it was like, cuz guess all the actual bills are gonna change, like companies. But the amounts are not gonna be probably that much, but they will be a little bit comparable.

[00:41:57] But it’s easy, I’m telling. The hardest part is logging in. I’m not lying about that. Yeah, and then you just can change it. and I will tell you, so like one of the big que question we get is, well, I can’t do electric or my water bill, cuz that changes every month. Well actually you can do a 12 month average.

[00:42:12] You can log into your account and do a 12 month average. And we suggest starting this in the fall. So that way right now is a perfect time to be able to do that. So that way, cuz if your bills are less, but you’re gonna be allotting for more for the summertime. In the wintertime when you’re using a lot of AC and a lot of heat.

[00:42:28] So that way you’re averaging out what your 12 months in, you’re always putting the same amount in it, but it’s gonna cover your bill regardless if it’s higher or low. And then good thing is when you move. So many things change, but it’s like, I always have this Bills account. I know exactly which account always pays all the bills.

[00:42:41] So when I call the, the, um, power company, when I call the cable company and I’m getting everything set up, I have the same account. It’s already set, it’s funded. I don’t have to think about like, you know, it’s just, it’s. . It’s just systemizing your life, automating your life in one more area so that you don’t have to use brain calories in the moment.

[00:42:56] Yeah, it’s the most important part, for sure. It’s, it’s nice when you don’t have to think about something and it’s actually working for you. Yeah, absolutely. And that’s the thing, you don’t, in the moment, you know exactly what is happening with your money without having to worry about it. It’s happening for you automatically.

[00:43:12] Um, all you have to do is supervise it and a lot of times what we find is, People, lots of people. It’s not just her. She was probably just the first one to do it, or my husband, I don’t know. They would go on the first and now they’re paying all their bills early. They’re like, I’m not waiting. I’m so excited.

[00:43:24] I, I know the money’s there and I don’t have to worry about it. I’m paying all the bills. All the bills. You can, yeah, so it’s just, it’s, it’s funny what kind of nerd you might turn into once you. Once you feel better about your money situation, you know For sure. So as we wrap up, if someone is trying to figure out all this out and they’re like, I need some help, where do they go to get in touch with you?

[00:43:45] What? What can you offer and how do they connect with you? . Yeah, it’s super simple. They can go to my ideal balance.com/finance. Mm-hmm. , like it’s that simple. That’s where we’re at. We, I mean, you can go to our website, you can email us info myel balance.com as well. But yeah, that’s, that’s as simple as it is.

[00:44:02] Yep. And we, um, we do one-on-one coaching to help clients and, and we tell ’em, like, our goal is to be able to give you your wings and for you to fly away and be able to do it on your own. Again, we have clients that have been with us for a long time because they love the account. But honestly, like if we can implement these systems in a short period of time and allow them the, you know, the success to be able to do it on their own, like that is amazing.

[00:44:23] That feels really good for us to be able to show them, help them, coach them, change their mindset, change their habits, and then set them free. Yeah, because every, it’s a spectrum. There are people that, like we have had, not very many, but we have had people that they coach for one month. They get everything set up and they’re done.

[00:44:39] Yeah. Like they, they, that’s all they needed. Like our 1%. They just needed to know the how and they. and then there’s people that need. a little bit more, right? They just need a little bit more. They’re, it takes, you’re gonna pry this credit card for my cold, dead hands, whatever, stuff like that. So it’s like a slower process.

[00:44:53] And then there’s just people, like Vanessa said, they have big goals and, and they just need a long, longer time. Mm-hmm. . And that’s fine either way. Wherever you are in the spectrum, it’s okay to get coaching. Like it’s okay to get help with something that you’re not feeling good about because what’s the alternative?

[00:45:08] You know what I mean? Just try to keep doing what you’re doing right. It’s probably not gonna work out as well. Yeah, if you’re happy with what you’re doing, obviously keep doing, but if you can see room for improvement, we’d love to chat with you and help you. Well, thank you so much for coming on today.

[00:45:21] This has been really good, really beneficial. Last question for both of you. What is each of your big goals for the future? Oh, we have the same goal, . Shocking. We have, we’re, we’re fine. We’re ready. So much alike. It’s fine. Um, our goal, our biggest financial goal is to retire our husbands from their current job.

[00:45:41] that they’re both in, that they love. Yeah, I’m shaking my head. They don’t love them. . They have, um, paved the way and provided, you know, for their families for so, so much and, and we would love to be able to switch roles. Not obviously it’ll have them be stay at home, but to be able to maybe change and, and do something they never thought about.

[00:45:59] Yep. I love that. Well, thank you so much for coming on and for sharing. Um, hopefully you will be getting lots more people headed your way because I know this is something that so many of us struggle with and it’s just really good to have those resources, um, because when you know better, you can do better.

[00:46:16] Yep, absolutely. Yeah, that’s great. Thank you for the opportunity to be here. Okay, friends, I hope you got so much out of that episode. Send me a message. Let me know what you loved, what your big takeaways. We’re from this episode because I know finances are such an important piece of our conversation, especially as military families who move a lot, who have all of these added expenses and understanding these systems that the military uses to pay and what types of pay and.

[00:46:49] When you get that, when you don’t get that and how to set this all up can be confusing and that’s why people like Vanessa and Shayna are here to help. So I would encourage you, if you have questions, please reach out to them, go listen to their podcast. That’s a free way to get started. Then you can see if that they’re coaching would be something that you would benefit that your family.

[00:47:14] Benefit from, don’t forget the replay of the plan year 2023 workshop is still available for you to go grab. I hope you will take time to set some goals for this year to really set a budget for this year and. that you would use those money conversations to really start to have some good conversations about your future, about dreams, about the things that are on your heart, that are on your spouse’s heart, because ultimately that’s what we want to do.

[00:47:48] We want to help you tap into what are the things that light me. And what do I want to do with that? How can we live with more meaning and purpose and build a life, design a life that we love? This is your opportunity to dream about the future. Whether you want to start your own purpose fueled business, whether you want to invest your time into working for or starting a nonprofit or.

[00:48:18] Or whatever those dreams are. Thinking about finances with that long-term view in mind is so important. And I know that’s hard to do when it feels like there’s barely enough money to pay the bills that you have, but the more that you can adopt that long-term mindset, the more it’s going to pay off. In the long run, so I hope you got a lot out of this.

[00:48:45] I would love for you to hop into our free Facebook community and let me know your thoughts. Go to SPE mastermind.com/community to jump inside. Introduce yourself. I would love to connect with you. Until next time, may you live filled, fueled and full of joy.