Call it providence, fate, the hand of God, whatever you want.

In July I put a hold on the book Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear. I waited six months for a copy to come available. My library has an app to where you can request digital books to read on Kindle. It makes my book reading habit a lot more affordable…but it also requires me to be patient when I want to read a specific book.

But Atomic Habits finally became available…just as I was contemplating the end of 2019 and the beginning of 2020. I finished the book on New Years Day. It. was. so. good.

When you read my post on my Top Reads of 2019, you’ll see that I read The Power of Habit last year. It did a great job of talking about the science and theory behind habits. But while it gave me a deep level understanding of why we do what we do, Atomic Habits gave me a practical how-to guide to building healthy habits and dismantling unhealthy ones. In fact, the author actually mentions that he designed his book to pick up where the Power of Habit left off.

It’s been very eye opening as I lean more into my identity and belonging. In this post I talked about shifting from the mindset of “accomplishing” to “becoming.” I’ve seen this theme pop up in a number of places over the last few weeks.

2020 Goals: The January Effect

It’s most likely because as we enter a new year…and a new decade, people are talking about a fresh start. They are hoping for something different than the way their life currently looks. People are talking about goal setting,

However, the fact that I’m talking about setting 2020 goals and thinking through habit patterns in late January means that I’m behind the curve. It means I didn’t hit the ground running on January 1. It means that at the beginning of the year I was still wrestling through these concepts and figuring out what change should look like in my life.

On January 1 my Facebook feed was filled with people talking about 2020 goals, resolutions and “words of the year.” January 1 feels like a fresh start, a time to make a change. And while there is science behind starting a new habit at the beginning of a week, a month, or a year…there is much more to habit formation. 

That’s why, as we close out January, fewer people are talking about setting 2020 goals. Fewer people are making healthy food choices or going to the gym. And fewer people are making long-term habit changes. 

A month from now many will have already forgotten their word of the year, along with their resolutions to “do better” and “be better.”

So what is the difference between making a change and simply talking about change? It comes down to habits.

Our habit patterns are things we do without a lot of conscious thought. They are the things we revert back to doing because it’s familiar, it’s known, it’s comfortable. We can’t just decide to overhaul our behaviors and actions and expect that it will stick. Changing behavior patterns and developing new habits that last takes intentionality and practice. 

That’s why I am so thankful that the timing of my reading this book coincided with me analyzing what I wanted out of my 2020 goals. It was such a good reminder that the journey to creating new habits doesn’t happen overnight.

You’re Not Alone

Of course talking about 2020 goal setting in late January also means confronting one of the most common lies out there: the lie that “it’s too late to get started.” Or in my case, that it’s too late to talk about 2020 goals.

If you didn’t hit the ground running on January 1 or if you did get started and then fail to keep up with your resolutions, you’re not alone. It’s discouraging. It can be easy to give up and resign yourself to trying again next year.

The reason I’m talking about goal setting now is because it’s never too late. Developing healthier habits is always possible. And it’s always important. “Late” is better than “never.” Failing is better than not trying. Getting back up is better than quitting. When we change our mindset about habit formation and give ourselves grace, it changes the equation.

When we change our mindset about habit formation and give ourselves grace, it changes the equation.

2020 Goal Setting: 3 Keys to Developing Lasting Change

Here are three keys to developing healthy habit patterns that last. If you really want to enact a change, I highly recommend reading Atomic Habits. But here are three foundational concepts to get you started:

Adopt a growth mindset

So often we want to be “good” at something. We want to “accomplish” something. We want to feel confident and competent. And while there is nothing inherently wrong with any of these things, we can easily get tripped up by thinking that we can’t change or that changing is just too hard. It’s the idea that “if I can’t do it well right now, I probably shouldn’t try.” It’s a mindset that keeps us trapped in our current habit patterns.

Conversely, when we adopt a growth mindset that sees there is always room for growth and improvement, it opens the door to possibility.

Focus on habits and foundations, not outcomes   

True habit formation begins with incremental actions. It begins with things that don’t obviously move the needle. The two-minute rule says that to establish a new, lasting habit, begin with an action that takes no longer than two minutes to do.

Losing 20 pounds can sound daunting, but putting on workout clothes each day is doable. Writing a book is hard, writing two sentences is doable. 

A healthy habit formation process looks like driving to the gym and committing to work out for five minutes. Later on five minutes turns into ten and so forth. 

The problem starts when we shift our focus off the habit we are developing. We compare ourselves to other people at the gym. Or we get frustrated that we cannot see any visible results from our efforts. Yes, it’s going to take a while to see results. But when we do, they will be results that stick.

Most diets fail because people are looking to make a drastic change. They make a big shift for a short period of time (often based on sheer determination and will power), but when that goal is met, the results are unsustainable. The unhealthy habit patterns come rushing back in.  

Remember progress, not perfection 

You’re going to mess up. I’m going to mess up. There is no such thing as doing something perfectly all the time. There is no such thing as never forgetting or skipping a new habit. But our response is key. Do we beat ourselves up or do we give grace? Do we give up or do we try again?

As an Enneagram One, I am my own worst critic. I spend a lot of time wishing I had handled certain situations differently or shown up in a different way. I can tell you all the ways I have fallen short of my goals.

But I’ve also learned to give myself grace. I’ve learned to accept that I’m not where I want to be and that this is a journey. There will always be things to knock us off course, obstacles to who we want to become. Change doesn’t happen overnight. Change is a continual process of learning, trying, failing, getting back up again and trying again.

Change is a continual process of learning, trying, failing, getting back up again and trying again.

My 2020: Think Growth Not Goals

My 2019 word of the year was intentionality. I had taken significant steps towards who I wanted to become, but with a new baby arriving at the end of 2018, I knew my world was about to turn upside down.

2019 was about adjusting to life with three littles. I don’t feel like I made measurable progress towards living a life of more freedom, flourishing and influence. BUT I also didn’t take steps backward.

This was key for me, because unhealthy habit patterns are easy to fall back into. In 2019, I was intentional about maintaining the progress I had made. I spent time analyzing myself and my habit patterns, I spent time reading and I spent time thinking about who I want to become. Heck, I even started blogging.

Sometimes we go through tough seasons. Seasons happen: a major life change, a new job, a new baby, a health diagnosis.

But eventually we reach the end of a season. We adjust to a new normal. We reach a point where we can look beyond just making it through.

2020 is a new season. I’m ready to set some 2020 goals focused on growth. I’m ready to move the needle toward growth: mentally, spiritually, physically, relationally. I’m ready to begin making the incremental changes that will lead me closer to a life of freedom, flourishing and influence. I’m ready to move towards become who God made me to be and the story he is writing with my life.

That is where Atomic Habits was so helpful to me. It reminded me that developing healthy habits are important because they set the direction for who I want to become.

It’s not about a specific end goal or destination, but a direction for life. It is about the process of building habits and foundations that move me forward. I keep making progress, I keep becoming.

Your 2020 Journey

It begins with mindset.

It starts with focusing on habits and foundations.

It builds through a focus on progress, not perfection.

And ultimately it is about taking the journey to who we are becoming.

Isn’t this what we really want out of our new years resolutions, our goals, our words of the year?

And the beautiful thing about habits is that they are not additive. They compound. If I improve something by 1% each day, over the course of a year I become 37 times as effective at it.

When we reach the end of 2020 and reflect back on it, who do you want to be? How do you want to have showed up? How do you want to have grown? What do you want to be more effective at?

If you haven’t started a growth journey this year, it’s not too late to begin. And if you’ve already given up on your 2020 goals, perhaps it’s time to begin again.

Come join me on this journey to becoming who you were meant to be.